Getting started: Some reflection on late-diagnosis, starting meds, and mourning missed opportunities (though always with the understanding that itās not like life would have been easy if I had known). It felt really good to get these thoughts down though the post kind of goes all over the place.
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i was diagnosed with ADHD at 33, but was told iād need to see a specialist to be diagnosed for autism. it would make sense, and i feel your same feelings about it on why i consider it so much and think about saving the money for it even if it is just a diagnosis. it matters greatly to me, partly for closure, partly for just understanding why things in my life went the way they did sometimes
i really appreciate you writing about this. one of my early goals with my blog was to help someone who read something feel a little more seen or a little less alone. so i greatly appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts and feelings on what youāve experienced, because i see myself in some of this blog post, and it means a lot
i wish you best of luck in your journey of understanding yourself
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i thought youāre in your 20s oops
i feel like it sometimes, with how often iām the last one to figure something out about myself lol
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Thatās awesome to hear, Iām glad that my post helped you feel seen in a good way. Thatās also why I like to keep a blog, and why I started it up again. it helps me so much when people somehow figure out my heart better than I can, so if I can do that for someone else or help them understand themselves better then I am doing well!
I think thereās a lot to unpack that I couldnāt even begin to start talking about, but it feels like what Iām experiencing is similar to what Iāve read a lot of other people have experienced in this journey. itās kind of sad for us as a collective community that we have to go through this but Iām glad that we have each other to lean on and understand each other.
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The Weekly Wrap Up is here! I bought some art and music, attended an interesting talk and of course there are some cool links - one about waiting, one about becoming and one about witnessing.
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I am so tired of seeing the same set of topics in my RSS reader: Topic blockers ā Manu
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I donāt get cookie clicker :(
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I ended up thinking about that this morning, but it wonāt show up in your feed reader because itās on the new site.
CW: profanity
https://new.starbreaker.org/grimoire/entries/re-topic-blockers/index.html
The problem I see with word filtering is that it might result in a lot of false positives. Iād also have to run this at a network level because I consume a lot of content in my RSS reader and that is not web based since itās a standalone app.
I think I already have a few simple filters on feedbin but iād love something more conceptual. So block content that talks about this general topic which is obviously harder to do using a method like the one you proposed.
But yours is for sure better than nothing!
Yeah, itās definitely a blunt instrument, and hard to use with any finesse. Otherwise, Scunthorpe wouldnāt be a problem
This oneās a little heavier than the other posts Iāve written so far. Ableism is the norm among academics who study autism, and I canāt help but think about that every time I set foot on the local university campus.
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Iām very sorry that your university decided to do an ABA program and treat people with autism like lab animals. Itās honestly disgusting they would take money from Autism Speaks of all places, I donāt know how they havenāt been taken down. Good on you for getting the fuck out of there and not entertaining them any further, I can only hope other people also avoid that interview too.
Iām tired of it. Ableism shouldnāt be the norm in any field of study.
I agree, ableism really sucks. Itās not only isolated incidents in learning institutions, but a systemic problem in general.
I donāt have any examples related to Academia, but I do remember that one time that I was treated like a dog by a shitty psychologist when I was a teenager;
CW: suicide mention, nothing specific
I was in their office after a suicide attempt (that was recent during that time) and they didnāt have an ounce of sympathy for me. They were very irritated because I wasnāt able to respond to their questions fast enough and I was hyper focused on a tiny pencil. They seemed more concerned about kicking me out of their office as fast as possible, that they just referred me to another psychologist after the visit.
I havenāt forgotten that event since. It was the reason why I became wary of mental health professionals until recently. I might make a blog post talking about ableism too in the near future. Even in the places where youāre supposed to be helped by professionals, they still treat you like a lab rat.
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this is a blog post about navigating emotion during times of depression. i would say it is somber, but i do not wish it to be taken as sad. it is kind of just me navigating some thoughts with my keyboard
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It sounds to me like Goldenrod University is a shithole, or at least its psychology department is.
But I wasnāt diagnosed as autistic until I was in my early 40s. When I was, I noticed my shrink treating me differently. Looking down on me. I called them on it, and told them I wasnāt going to put up with somebody who isnāt even family treating me like Iām defective.
I got enough of that growing up. Frankly, I find neurotypical people who think they know anything about autism just a bit presumptuous. Iād like to see them try living inside my head, just for 24 hours.
And thereās nothing wrong with Autism Speaks that canāt be fixed by the IRS stripping those grifters of their non-profit status.
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Clipped and re-hosted video of Twitch streamer and VTuber Nyanners on my blog. I donāt know if it really fits in here, but a lot of what made blogs run in the past wasnāt original content so Iām posting it anyway.
Todayās web has been described as āfive giant websites, each filled with screenshots of the other four.ā We can take a step toward rectifying that situation by posting screenshots and video clips on our small websites. 
Inspired by a few other bloggers out there, I share my tech stack.
Initially wrote this post as a 4000 word piece, but edited it down to the bare minimum. Came off alright, for once, I think!
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My first thought is of Rawdog Simulator where āplayers stare at the screen, with the camera picking up when the virtual rawdogging is interrupted and eyes move away from the screen to flush out cheating ā giving a five-second warning to āget back to rawdoggingā before itās game over.ā
My second thought is of timers, energy, and stamina bars as part of a monetization strategy in F2P games. FarmVille is a good example. Crops take time to mature but a player could pay to use a biplane with āinstant grow.ā In Warframe items might take multiple real-world days to build, but can be ārushedā with real-world money.
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I am always tempted by some new gadget, app or service. But if I have one goal for the coming year, it is to make even better use of what I currently have at my disposal
It sounds like youāre already smashing this goal after reading this post 
Ended up writing a short post based on the discussion we were having here on the forum: Digital responsibilities ā Manu
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